My Summer of Self-Discovery

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I am so grateful for growth and maturity. I am grateful for the light that flickers within my soul, reminding me that I have purpose.

Throughout my life, I’ve had this ongoing fear of judgment, ridicule and even success. Yes, there have been times where I’ve feared my own potential. I constantly question my abilities and compare them to others, which ultimately prevents me from fully taking advantage of the life that circulates through my veins. Have any of you ever felt this way? Felt fear of letting go and surrendering your heart to the possibilities that live in the unknown?

Over the past few months, I’ve existed in this ongoing stupor. Deep down, I felt stuck. Merely existing in this grand world and not truly living. I was idly present in this perpetual cycle of fear and doubt and wanting to be a more courageous person, but oblivious to the steps I needed to take in order to move towards purposeMY purpose!

Until recently, I’ve never really been able to grasp and process it all. My desires, my shame, my anger, my fears, my subconscious habits, they all just existed in this Continue reading

Seeing Beauty Amid Chaos

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God can use both stillness and chaos to shape his purpose for your life. He does not exist within the chaos, but he can use it for your good.

I can attest to the fact that sometimes life can throw you some unexpected curveballs. But one thing I’ve learned, and I’m still learning is that God is never through. Through every valley, every mountain top, thunderstorms and sunny skies, God is always working on your behalf.

When you’re in the midst of your storm

And calamity encircles the makings of your existence

Joy and peace may appear light years away

Frustration and fear attempting to smolder

What optimism was left within your soul

But still, your courage & faith must persevere Continue reading

To Trust Again: But Who Likes Walking Blind?

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Trust is like a valued treasure for me.

I admit, my ability to trust in the unknown has been compromised by past experiences. There have been instances where I’ve felt abandoned by those who I thought should love me the strongest, wrongfully judged by others who should have represented safety and refuge, and betrayed by those who had my whole heart.

Trust, at its crux, must be cultivated. It must be cherished and respected with high regard by all parties involved. Trust must be nurtured and viewed with gentle awe. Continue reading

Novocain the Pain, or Nah?

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Overwhelming emotions are simultaneously introduced

Pain, betrayal, fear, shame

You take your pick

But she doesn’t want to wine and dine

 

To taste the bitterness produced

By resentful anger and its fame

Renown for its antagonistic wrath

Consuming all who allow his entry

 

No! She’ll rather partake in Joy and Forgiveness

Have peace enter in the same

To create her own path

Where Love, Success & Happiness abound

 

Choosing to lean into the uneasiness

She will not numb her symptoms this time around

 

Often times, I know it can be difficult to confront our emotions. So much so that we choose to hide behind them instead, pretending that they don’t exist; hoping them into oblivion. Instead of allowing ourselves to be vulnerable and truly experience our feelings, we choose to numb them instead. Blinded by the ache mounting beneath your left rib cage, you inject your Novocaine of choice into the coronary arteries surrounding your pained heart.  Continue reading