#30Layers30Days – Day 4: 100%

miss-you-2000-13

One area in my life where I am still working on showing up 100% would be in my marriage. I love my husband, dearly. We’ve been through sooo much over the years, but still yet – I thank God for the journey. As I’m transforming into this new woman, working to no longer seek the approval of man as the path I use to define who I am, there have been challenges. I have been challenged to let old habits die hard! Challenged to not allow the old me to creep into my present…

As I grow more aware of myself and develop a knowing in my heart that I am beautiful and worthy of the finer things in life – agape love, joy, trust, respect! I am also challenged to stand!!! Stand behind the promise I made to myself to never again hide who I am or who I want to be.

I want my husband to appreciate and love this new woman emerging and not question the source of my growth. Not to say that he does not appreciate the new woman. But, that’s just it… fear attempts to creep in and again I begin to project my assumptions and fears onto our relationship, which keeps me from boldly showing up 100% in my marriage.

I am trying, daily. But that’s enough with the trying – I need to just, DO! And so that is the charge I give to myself. To continue to stand and without fear of being 100% authentically me in one of the most important relationships I will have in my life – my marriage.

Until Next Time

-S.

 

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